Posted in February 2012

Fair

Very little is fair from McDiesel’s perspective. It’s not fair that he gets the crab plate instead of the pirate plate (no matter which one he’s specifically requested or how many times I’ve moved food from one to the other). It’s not fair that there’s not more syrup in the bottle (although there’s more than … Continue reading

Divorce

Husband Number One (and no, not as in #1—as in The First) comes home late from long day at work. He doesn’t want to ask. I know because I never want to ask when I come home from work, either. He finally does. He can’t ignore the anxiety rays I’m shooting in his direction. “How … Continue reading

Model

“No. Really,” she says as she touches my arm. “You’re crazy if you don’t look into it.” This is McDiesel’s Sunday School teacher (who also happens to be a regular, real teacher. This gives her credibility.). She has just pulled me aside to explain why McD is not choosing a prize from the treasure box … Continue reading

Workhouse

In case you’re wondering, yes, I am aware ADHD medication exists. And I don’t want to seem terribly literary, but remember when the gentlemen come to Mr. Scrooge, asking for a donation to help the poor and destitute at Christmas? And he has the callous and unfeeling response: “And the … workhouses? … Are they … Continue reading

Remorse

Dear Miss Betsy, Thank you for the email—we sincerely appreciate your serious concern about McDiesel’s behavior at school. We’re glad to hear you feel he’s made great strides behaviorally in the past months (especially since we had no idea you were undertaking such strides whatsoever). To answer your pressing question (and thank you for asking): … Continue reading

Superpower

I’ve changed. I used to be hypersensitive about how well-behaved and quiet and “normal” other kids McD’s age were. They’d sit and listen to a book in the waiting room; they’d hang onto the cart in the store; they’d get from the school door to the car—or from one end of a sentence to the … Continue reading

Severe

Severe is not good. Not good to hear in association with your child. …Or in association with much of anything, for that matter. So then especially not good regarding your child. Teachers don’t say your little boy is severely smart or severely gifted. Doctors don’t say your little boy is severely healthy or severely thriving. … Continue reading

Practice

Child psychiatrist rocked our world with McDiesel by contradicting common parenting wisdom, common inlaw advice, and common sense. He said, “There is no ‘practice.’” No practicing sitting quietly in church, no practicing eating out at a restaurant, no practicing staying with the cart on a big grocery shopping trip. McDiesel cannot “practice” this; it will … Continue reading